Love in Marriage .. Is not by default

First and foremost, Kudos to all who have taken the first step of getting married, being in it and making it happen. It could be bumpy on certain days, lovely on some and mostly fulfilling. It could even get crazy if you let it.

I always believe that marriage is very much like an exam. If you put alot of effort into it, get prepared, does lots of practices and homework, it will definitely get you the A's you wanted, and off course otherwise. If one plans to just sit back and relax and let things happen on it's own, the outcome may not be as one may desire.

Remember how cool and entertaining we used to be when we dated? How understanding and receptive we were to our partner? Where has those values gone to? Is it still with you or you've turned into a different person?

Looking fantastic for your husband vs looking fantastic only to work seems to be confusing most of us. We should dress our best in front of our husband, speak politely, show much love and gratitude and most importantly, show tons of respect. But many of us has done the complete opposite. They'd do it for their bosses but not their husbands. This is quite funny, because your boss can fire you anytime, but your husband will be there through goods and bad.

Some younger friends, after delivering their first baby seems to be married to their baby instead of their husband, he then become a stranger to her and will be given the distance. It's tough being a wife and a mother, I agree, but that's where you're 'the special one'. You could do both and you could find the middle path to be there for your child but at the same time still be that dotting wife you're supposed to be.

When I said love is not by default, pray for love. Many of us pray for money, pray for health, but often forget to pray for love. It's also a "Rezeki" , not by default. Pray that your love with your husband will always taste like the first day and the excitement of seeing each other will always be there. As the religion always teaches us, Put in your effort and end it with tawakkal and prayers. InsyaAllah.

I'm not being on the man's side, don't get me wrong. I'm totally on yours. I'm only urging my sisters to preserve and maintain her marriage so that she doesn't have to blame that 'devil in the red dress' if she ever cross your path and snatch your ' unguarded possessions". If you've done your best and have been that wife you're supposed to be, it's quite unlikely that your husband will budge, why should he, for he've gotten an 'angel in the white dress'.

I leave it to you... Just writing this out of love..